Tuesday, October 20, 2009

STFU AFRICANS!

I am so sick and tired of Africans and their holier than thou-our shit don't stink attitude. What has got me so fired up? Well i finally saw the trailer for this Ghanaian movie called Heart of Men
and if you read the comments you would think Africa was filled with puritanical countries or something. Kindly stfu! I guess its ok to stick guns up the butts of women, rape women in broad daylight, kill albinos for rituals but you will get all offended when a movie features sexual activity? Stfu! Seriously! The same continent filled with some of the most corrupt leaders ever known to man. Do i really need to list them? Take this particular comment from some imbecile on youtube
debby1111111111 (5 days ago) Show Hide
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what is this i know ghana people will be the first to spoil african's image omg what rubbish and nonsense...................... ghana u suckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.
How much you wanna bet the idiot is Nigerian? Olodo oshi! Sorry to break it to you dumbass but you motherfuckers did that all by your damn self. What image are we talking bout here? Omo go jump off a bridge. Ori gbo gbo yin daru. Coming online and acting like you are not a continent of child rapists, money stealers and oppressive regimes. Go fuck yourselves!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

O fe gba epe

Apparently some men know like after the 3rd or 4th date if they will marry a woman or not and vice/versa. This is news to me sha. But anyways, this is my problem. If you know you aint ever gonna marry this chick, why in the world would you get in a serious relationship with her? Im talking 4-5 years. Seriously? How can you in good conscience string her along for that long knowing you have no intention of marrying her? And some of you men wonder why these women are bitter. The problem is y'all dont even check each other anymore. And the poor girl will be there thinking "oh my boo" not knowing her boo is just there for steady yanshing. You cant even blame the girl too much. Its not like she has a crystal ball and she can see into his mind. This kind of deception is horrible. Hell...any kind of deception is horrible and very unbecoming. You men fail to think of the future cos some idiot will do the same to your pikin. When they say you reap what you sow, it wasnt a joke. And a lot of you have gotten into the habit of "na my boy" even when you know they are doing something horrible. Will it kill you to point out to them the error of their ways? Lord please don't direct any evil doer down my path in Jesus name. Awon okunrin emi ko fe ma gba epe buruku on a daily basis!

Monday, August 17, 2009

Plea to Naija Parents

and other African parents. I don't know how bad this epidemic is with other Africans but i can speak of the problems it is causing within the Nigerian community because i have first hand knowledge of it.
I am very sure we are all aware of the subjugation of African women. But for some reason, it seems Nigerian women are perfectly ok playing this role continuously and passing the same values and mentality to their daughters. The most annoying is the constant need to regard a non-married woman over the age of 30 as defective or sub par almost.

Marriage can be a beautiful thing, if it is entered by two people who want the same thing and who
at least have some kind of endearing feelings for each other. Culture and tradition also play a huge role in this nonsense and its high time we put a stop to the bullshit. In this day and age, a woman over 30 should not be made to feel like she has achieved nothing if she doesn't have a husband. My parents tried to bring up that husband crap with me a while back but i nipped it in the bud. I will bring a man when i am good and ready and not before. While i am still in my 20s, some older women are not so fortunate. They are constantly bombarded with questions like "when will you marry" or "you are getting old o". Really? no shit. She doesn't know she is growing old abi? You have to keep reminding her. Keep in mind these women are not some jobless somebody. These are successful women who have usually achieved much academically and successfully. But at the end of the day, according to African standards, those achievements don't mean jack squat if they aint got a man. Truly pathetic. Just last week i read on someone's blog about a 40 year old woman who was constantly pestered by her family to "marry now", "your mates are mothers". Imagine having to hear this day in and out from your family members. Always feeling like you will never be complete until some man decides to marry you. She gave in to their nagging and allowed herself to be set up with some dude in some European country. I doubt she met the dude before they even married sef and she was shipped off to live with him. The family probably thought "we have done well. she will not bring us shame with her spinsterhood". If only they knew the man they just married her off to was a gay man. His family knew of course. They always know but they don't care. They would rather save face than allow people to live their own lives. SMH!


Just yesterday i got a text from a friend of mine asking me to call her back. When i did, she proceeded to update me on the history of some guy her parents had been trying to set her up with. She already told me a lot bout the dude and how he calls her all the time and even his mother took to calling her and asking her why she hasn't gone to visit her son the doctor. Talking bout we want babies. Oti. *rolleyes* Yesterday she got bored and started googling people. She googled him and what she found was too surreal. A website dedicated to his deadbeat dad ways and woman beater status. This dude had actually been to jail. This is the person they were trying so desperately to marry my friend off to o. This is how somebody will go and collect death sentence. Because some naija parents feel the need to marry of their daughters. God Forbid. And i know my friend, her temper is unrivaled. That is how she will say something to the fool and i will be seeing her picture on Channel 7 talking bout she is missing. Please for the love of God, leave them alone. God's time is the best as some of our elders are so fond of saying yet they refuse to practice it. How hypocritical is that? And African women, you need to stand up for yourselves. No one will have your back like you can. Dont for one second think you are the only one being pressured by family members. But if you do not stand up for yourself, you just might find yourself married off to some bi-curious naija dude in some European country.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

The Belligerence of Hypocrites

"One of the signs of a hypocrite is his belligerence in argument" - Prophet Muhammad

I know i am probably coming off as a naija man basher but quite honestly, that is not the case. I love my Nigerian men. The problem is, some of you are very stupid and for some odd reason, you have no qualms displaying said stupidity in public. Case in point the naija brother who claims that the reason why Nigerian women wear weaves is because they are suffering from image and low self-esteem issues. This clown even went further as to ask us to justify why we are wearing weaves. I have a justification for you...How bout it aint none of your damn business? Seriously, if i want to do shuku and some to the front, if you don't like it, pls kindly waka away and go holla at a chick who is sporting a hair do more to your liking. Get it straight, we wear weaves because we want to, we carry our Afros because we want to. I dunno bout other women but let me speak for myself. My primary reason for grooming myself is not to attract y'all. Its for me. So if i want Beyonce type locks today, i will go and get my weave sewn in. If i want calabar braids, best believe i will do it too. Abi am i asking you to pay for it ni? Take these quotes from the same clown

Congrats with the bizness, im always in support of nigerian entrepeneurship...but im curious to kno why u choose to delve into an industry that basically seeks to exploit and diminish the value of black women taking pride in their natural features...cant u see that this whole lace wig/weave bizness only perpetuates the stereotype that black pple's hair isnt good enough, cant u see that all we're doing is subjecting ourselves to the standards of the white race???? i dont mean to go kunta kinte on ur ass but it just upsets me to live in such a world where a dominant group is basically tellin us we're not good enough and we constantly buy into such notions, and to make it worse, they profit off of the insecurities theyve planted in us .....just reminds me of the stories i hear of back in the slave days when black women with huge rear-ends were ridiculed for being abnormal, or where the black men were berated for having such large genitalia...infact u know what, lemme shut up b4 i pop a vein lol



and he goes on with his horseshit...


well thats neither here nor there...i would poke pretty much any kind of good looking female irregardless of the hair, but i would respect u even more as a person when a girl takes pride in her natural features...infact i love me some afro-centric lauryn hill looking female, those types are fearless and much less insecure like all yall
this dude...actually feeling like somebody naija girls are checking for...dumbo! If these clowns saw 2 girls, one with an afro and one with a weave, majority of the time, they choose the one with the cascading weave. Spare me the bullshit Pls! Hypocritcal dumdum.

Look, all im saying is, in this day and age, you find more black women feeling more pressure to avoid going natural, and its not about other races using weaves or wigs too, bcuz as many females in other races that u find using weave or what not, u will find just as many that go natural with their hair, there isnt any kind of pressure not to rock their natural hair, when those white ladies get weaves, its because they want to have more lustrous and long hair, of which there hair is already somewhat naturally inclined to look like that, but when we black people get weaves and lace and all that crap, we are basically going out of our elements just to subscribe to what other races regard as good hair, and u definitely dont find as many black females being proud of rocking their natural hair as u wud other races, and thats all im trying to say
So when white women get extensions, its because they want to enhance their beatuy but when its black women, its because we have insecurities about our hair? So the white people who tan nko? Are they trying to be black? I guess the next time i get a weave, i better make it an afro weave since my hair is naturally inclined to look like that. Has this clown really looked at black women lately? Apart from their backsides? If he had, he would have noticed that a lot of black women are going natural these days. So i dunno what tha heck he is talking about. I bet you if you research his female friends and family members, you will find more than 4 weavie wonders in there somewhere. All of a sudden he is a shrink who is trying to make us feel better about ourselves. Ma ti e si konga! Pls, we aint begging you to date us, but if you are so turned off by our weaves then by all means, go to the AA chicks you all so love yapping about...just keep in mind that AA chicks gaan are the alagbara of Hair weaves!
Meanwhile, speaking of stupid men, the next perverted old man most especially the oyinbo ones, who feels the need to constantly stare at my chest is gonna get it! No holds barred. Yes they are big but i refuse to believe you havent seen bigger. Nasty ass Mofockys!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Is that your real face?

So on the train this morning, this beautiful girl was sitting right across from me. Fresh faced and tight body. As a woman sef i was amazed at how good she looked. But to my surprise, this girl dug into her bag and produced this arsenal of make up and she proceeded from there. First came the pancake, then the mascara, then the sub pancake, and deputy pancake and lipstick, then eye shadow, then blush followed by the use of this big ass brush. By the time she was done, she looked nothing like the girl i was admiring a few minutes earlier. I tried as much as possible not to stare at the transformation but it was hard not to. By no means am i saying its wrong to use make up. But there was something really strange about her putting on her face on the train. The most make up i will even apply in public is lip gloss.

Meanwhile, i am so over naija girls and their constant need to be bitchy to one another. Case in point, the Bella Naija feature My Style. The premise of the feature is that Nigerian/African girls can send in pictures of themselves in different outfits and talk about their style. Get it? "Their Style", not my own or your own. Apparently all those years of reading Brighter Grammar has helped some of these girls none. The amount of venom spewed at the girls who dare to have themselves featured is down right scary. You would think most of these girls considered their style a personal affront or something. Very vicious and mean spirited. All because you don't like what they are wearing? There are some regular girls on there who have nothing positive to say about anybody. Every comment is always "omg what kind of nonsense is this?" to "you look like a slut". I just weak. Shebi if you think your style is better, you will send in your own pictures right? The most hilarious of all is this clown called fashion stylist. I mean, you have to read her comment to appreciate how stupid she sounds

Comment by Fashion stylist Subscribed to comments via email
2009-08-05 00:59:10

This is the first time i have ever commented on my style…and the reason why i am commenting today is because today’s MY STYLE is a train wreck with lots of encouraging platitudes..who the hell is she encouraging to mix zany with crazy???……The next my style should just quietly put up her pictures and allow us to judge her instead of trying to describe their wack ass looks like it is refreshing and original….Her Hair is cheap looking and wack….those eyelashes are ATROCIOUS…the makeup is a MESS…and the clothes are just ..shocking….One good thing is that Uche is very pretty…i think she has a great face and great legs!! But i wish she would just pick the right outfit for herself…when will people learn that less is more…if she would just put some 14 inch 3 packs of 1 straight Outre hair ..style it in a 40s do…pick up a nice sophisticated black or white dress in the style of audrey hepburns breakfast at tiffany’s (little black dress) and pair it with Black round toe. pumps (would go well with a navy blue version of that dress or cream pumps for a white version of the dress)..pair it with black verrryyy sheer tights with retro line going down the back.and hook herself up with some mac dark eye and ruby red lips…she would be REPHISTICATED…what i am seeing…is CHEAP rainbow crap…CRAP CRAP CRAP!


Comment by Fashion stylist Subscribed to comments via email
2009-08-05 16:35:51

I am not here to fight anyone…Half of the Nigerian girls on this forum dress like this uche girl anyway…i am tired of attending events and seeing nigerian girls wearing spandex, glitter earrings and cheap leather belts…It is her STYLE ..yes…but she shouldnt come on here giving advice and ways to mix and Match her crap…the last girl who was on here with the rubic’s cube purse…she was so cute and her style was quite fresh and she just stated her purpose in the right way..No evaluations or advice…just straight up “i am wearing this and that”…all these girls need to take a leaf from her book…dont try to convince me that ur style is bomb..ITS NOT!..I read her “description” before my pictures loaded..and expected something cute…by the time it loaded i was Pleasantly SURPRISED…..Tacky…is an understatement…Can i use this opportunity to beg everyone to throw away the PLASTIC colorful jewelry..the yellow bracelets, the red beads…and please if you dont money BUY clothes from forever 21..they have cute stuff there…RAINBOW and LVLX are Banned!!!..everything there is tacky looking and cheap!..stripper looking items loll…Try small…
She said and i quote, I dont wear reigning things..i wear them later in the years…i mean thats all cool and everything…but why is she wearing an ENTIRE outfit from 2005?…At least match the suspenders with something current like tailored pants…Instead of looking like she just stepped out of a time machine…Get with the times .. and…I am not insulting her…i am just defending my self from her horrific style…She needs a Do- OVER! …Yes i can put my picture here and i can promise you one thing…You will all bite your tongues!


These are some of the tamest comments and we are still waiting on her to post her pictures by the way. What happened to "if you have nothing nice to say then by all means say nothing?". At what point are you gonna stop tearing each other down? Or am i oblivious? Is there another reason why some girls/women are just mean to each other for no reason?


Monday, August 10, 2009

How bout you find your own man?

Seriously! Nothing good can come out of sleeping with someone else's man. Granted there are some situations where the girl does not realize that she is the side chick but once you become aware of your status, the best thing you can do is cut your loses and bounce. Its what any self-respecting female should do. But no, not some naija girls. Did you think i was gonna bash naija men alone? Oti...not i. Some girls actually have the liver to challenge the iyawo ile. I remember a situation a while ago where this dude was celebrating his birthday. Ofcourse you know how it is in naija community now, They have to pick aso ebi and do a big ole owanbe shindig. Pls tell me why the mistress and her friends/cohorts picked their own different aso ebi? I just weak. This is not a joke. This is how ballsy some women have become. I have to assume this woman is perfectly content being the mistress. Its the wife i pity. Imagine the shame.


And then you have the girl who was wooed and romanced by ole dude. Unbeknownst to her, dude had a main chick. So at some point she found out. And decided to confront the dude. The guy sha did some kain Diego Maradona moves and refused to be confronted. The girl kuku left it alone. After all, he is paying her car notes. Lol..abi? Its ok to be the side chick as long as he is paying your car notes, its all gravy.
After its all been said and done, all you can do is appeal to some of these women. Yes i know, its hard to find a decent naija guy but na only naija men you go chop? Seriously. Broaden your Horizon. Cos it will do you like film show if you bring that nonsense to my side.

Sunday, August 09, 2009

How do you solve a problem like Naija Men?

Well not all of them. But you would have to be have been living under a rock not to have noticed the sudden spurt of trifling Nigerian men. It is becoming quite ridiculous and i have stories for days. That in itself is sad. Just recently my friend went through a situation with one of these idiots. This guy was always on her ass. Even though whatever it was they shared ended years ago, he would not let go. So we were at a wedding a month ago and who did we run into but the same dude. He proceeded to stalk the life out of her after that. Calling, texting...and oh..did i forget to mention that he told her he was getting married? Yes. But his impending marriage was not enough to deter him from chasing her. But then he changed his story to, im not getting married. Basically a flip flopper so that alone was making him suspect. So this dude kept on calling and calling and leaving voice messages. So she decided to call him back and predictably, a woman picked up. My friend kuku pretended she had the wrong number. Keep in mind this dude had been calling her from like 3 different numbers. So she called on of his other numbers and he picked up and all you could hear in the background was a woman shouting in a really angry tone. Oh shit! The guy just hung up on my friend. Im like, imagine if you had believed all his bullshit and some girl had come to throw acid in your face cos of one ugly clown. Shio
Similar situation happened to me. This dude was years my senior in high school and we became facebook friends. We started chatting and it led to talking on the phone. You know how it goes, oh i like you, blah blah, this and that. The guy was really laying it on thick. But i was still wary. Then he told me bout his ex who still wanted him back and i was like ah ha. There we go. Now i know why i was so wary. One random day, i got a call from an unknown number. I didn't pick as usual and i didn't really pay any attention to it. Later that day, he called me and asked if i had received a call from an anonymous number to which i replied "yes". Turns out it was his ex. Dont ask me how but she had access to his phone account and saw all the calls he had made to my phone. So she decided to call my number and find out who it was. I told the dude. You know, i try as much as possible not to be embroiled in any kind of drama especially over a guy. I let him know if he wanted to continue talking to me, he had to go handle his business cos i am not the one. Come and see how this clown just turned on me. Talking bout, "don't talk to me that way, who do you think you are, i roll with prettier and hotter chicks". This dude is over 30 by the way. At this point i think my lower lip was on the floor. This dude started using the "f" word. Cussing and saying, 'what the fuck, fuck this and that". At that point i was like, if you really cant use your words, you need to get off my phone and i promptly hung up on him. So nonsensical.
Then you have the idiot who is dating a girl in Yankee. Been together for years o. Dude tells her he is going to naija for a visit and will be back soon. This girl takes his ass to the airport like the dutiful girlfriend. So the girl goes to his facebook page while he was still in naija only to see a message from a friend saying "kunle, congrats on your wedding in gidi, i had fun". And there it was, facebook evidence that this guy had left this girl in yankee and gone home to marry some other girl. I want to know what kind of sick person would do this? This is not even about being a player. Its about being an evil person. Cos only someone with an evil soul will do that to another human being. Almost every naija girl has a story about a naija dude who was trifing to her or someone she knows. In this Maryland alone i cant even count. Its too much. You men need to get your shit together. Because if you keep going around messing with people's emotions, you will get your comeuppance and it will not be painless, trust me! Treat others as you would want to be treated or better yet, how you want your own daughters to be treated. Because you will have children one day, would you really want her to encounter someone who displays the characteristics some of you have? Please think about it o.